Thursday, July 21, 2005

Will Work For ... Whatever.

My failed effort to become a host at Scream Channel.
At various times over the last several years, I have used my rather limited artistic talents to try to impress potential employers into if not hiring me outright, at least taking a second look. I would be pleased even to be called in for an interview to be rejected in person. Actually, even a nice rejection letter would be nice.
Instead, my plaintiff compositions are lost to the mystery that is the Canadian Postal Service with nary a word of acknowledgement.
I have posted some of the drawings on my FlickR page. I just think that I could be an interesting and an interested addition to nearly any industry if I were given a little guidance. I think I have always managed to put in a reasonable effort at everything I have done. My biggest hurdle is maintaining interest in any single vocation because I get bored easily.
Here is a mostly complete list of jobs I have done over the years:
  • Paperboy (also flyers)
  • Cashier, Cafeteria
  • Short Order Cook
  • Night Manager, Restaurant/Bar
  • Cleaner, Department Store
  • Dishwasher (several employers)
  • Server, Catering
  • Painter (for a chemical manufacturer)
  • Packer, Warehouse
  • Shipper
  • Haybaler
  • Muralist
  • Illustrator
  • Portraitist (various media)
  • Volunteer Swimming Instructor
  • Doorman
  • EmCee
  • DJ (rather poorly)
  • Inventory Coordinator
  • Signmaker
  • Screenprinter
  • Print Operator
  • Pre-Press Technician
  • Mac Operator
  • Graphic Designer
  • Copywriter
  • Packer, Bindery
  • Feeder, Bindery
  • Quality Auditor, Bindery
My current title is “Premedia Specialist,” whatever that means.

I have probably missed some, but I think this list makes my point sufficiently.
I remember my eighth grade teacher used to start many of the stories he employed in explaining our lessons by saying things like, “When I was planting trees in British Columbia, we always yadda yadda yadda,” and, “Now this is like when I worked on a fishing boat and the captain would blah blah blah…” We kids picked up on this and started making up possible jobs that our teacher might have had. Most of them were along the lines of “This is like when I was a Ninja back in Japan,” or “Back when I was a professional wrestler I used to…” Well, it sure seemed funny when I was twelve. But now I am that guy. Except, not a teacher. Just with the boring anecdotes from my lousy employment history.
That is all.


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